Parents - Bullying

In the past, I have had some parents ask me about bullying and what to do if their child is being bullied. I found this article on the Focus on the Family website and thought it may provide a little insight. The article is the first in a series of five articles, so go to http://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/schooling/bullying.aspx for the other articles and more info. If your child has struggled with being bullied or with bullying others I would enjoy hearing your thoughts about this article and insights you gained from your experience, so post them here or let's go have coffee!

Bullying by Brad Lewis
As a parent, there are four ways you can provide support to your child when he is being bullied.
1. Don't wait for your child to talk about it. You might need to poke around with different terms: "Is someone picking on you at school?" "Is anyone starting fights with you at recess?"
Some bullies threaten to harm your child or members of his family if he tells. Your child may also hesitate to talk if he feels guilty for allowing himself to be bullied. Keeping communication lines open will assure your child that there is hope.
2. Watch for nonverbal signs of bullying. Does your child want to stay home? Does he keep losing his lunch money? Is he hungry right after school even though he took a big lunch? These are all possible warning signs.
3. Encourage your child to make friends. Being with one other buddy might deter a bully. Most go for kids who are alone. While peer support does not replace adult intervention, it does provide an emotional safety net and, most important, it can help restore lost hope.
4. Let school authorities know what's going on in a discreet manner. Your child may fear that if you "do something about it," it will make things worse. Keep the same "easy touch" in mind if you know the parents of the bully and decide to contact them. Being aware of these dynamics can help you know how to respond.
Even if your child isn't a victim, it can be beneficial to have a discussion about this topic. Who knows? Your child might become a protector of someone being bullied, or he may even decide to show compassion to a bully who feels guilty about how he's treating others.